Liberal bloggers are facing a snark shortage that may have serious
implications in the coming months, experts say. Blog readers
are being warned to expect rationing and long lines at their
favorite liberal blogs -- and that some blogs may not make it
through the current crisis.
MAN
OF ATTACK. In which we are mentioned
in The New Yorker by Christopher Buckley:
Shortly after three o’clock in the afternoon
on March 17, 2003, Bob Woodward, an assistant managing editor of the
Washington Post, presented his D.C. driver’s license to a
Secret Service guard at the northwest gate of the White House.
Woodward was well known to the guards, having visited 2,372 times in
the previous two years to research his best-selling books.
[...]
The officer in the booth grinned and waved
Woodward through without looking at his I.D. Like everyone else in
Washington, he wanted to come off well in Woodward’s new book.
“Mr. Woodward!” he said as Woodward passed through, his tape
recorder setting off the metal detector. “Have you lost weight?
Been working out? You look fabulous!”
“Why, go right in, Mr. Woodward,” the President’s secretary
said cheerily, also wanting to be portrayed in a flattering light.
Knowing of his visit, she had had her hair done that morning. She
noted to herself that the President had now spent more time with
Woodward than he had with all the members of his Cabinet combined.
She was particularly impressed by this fact because she was so
familiar with her boss’s distaste for what he called “those élite
media A-holes.”
Although Woodward had been in the Oval Office almost three thousand
times since the President took office, he always felt a tingling
sensation in his amygdala, the almond-shaped mass of gray matter in
each hemisphere of the brain which governs feelings of aggression.
Thirty years earlier, he had caused a previous occupant of “the
Oval” to evacuate it almost overnight and move to California,
where he got a clot in his leg and nearly died. Woodward did not
blame himself for the clot.
[...]
However, Woodward had recently published a
favorable book about Bush’s invasion of Afghanistan, a wretched
country ruled by unambiguously odious bearded people who hated
America even more than most foreigners do. As a result, Bush felt
relaxed in Woodward’s presence. As was his custom, he had bestowed
a nickname on him: Woodpecker.
Our importance, and recognition, grows every
day.
Read The Rest depending upon whether you
found this funny or tedious. Our editorial staff found the remainder
hilarious, but what do we know?
